A Big, Fat, Hairy Goal

I rode my bike today and the internal dialogue went a little something like this:

“Yup, this sucks.  I should’ve taken a nap instead.”

“No, you need to get on your bike.  Be consistent.  You’ll get your fitness back.”

“That really old man on a mountain bike with sneakers just passed you like you were standing still.  Was he laughing at you?  You could always just turn around and ride home now.”

“Stop comparing yourself to other riders.  Maybe you can find some remote place to ride where there’s no one else on the road and no one will recognize you.”

“This is miserable.  Don’t you always say that if it’s not fun, don’t do it?  This is definitely not fun.”

“Whew!  2,000’ of climbing in 20 miles.  It sucked, but that’s a solid ride.  Stop beating yourself up and enjoy the cruise home.”

“I guess this is better than the ride this weekend.  Wait a minute, it might even be fun again.”

“That cute guy keeps talking to me.  Maybe I don’t look so miserable after all.”

“Wow, that was the best ride ever!”

I’m not a natural athlete.  I’m not a genetic freak like many of the riders I know.  I didn’t even participate in any sports or fitness activities for the first 30 years of my life.  In the past 15 years, since I started riding a bicycle, I’ve had to train really hard just to be a mediocre rider.  And now, after 3+ months off the bike, it feels impossible that I’ll even be mediocre again. 

I find it impossible to remember that just a few months ago I could climb mountains and ride my bike all day.  I think back to the awesome events I rode in the past 12 months (Furnace Creek 508, US Paralympic Track Nationals, La Vuelta Puerto Rico, the monthly Strava Gran Fondos, a ride around Lake Tahoe, and the Death Ride climbs, and can’t see myself ever being able to do that again. 

I often feel hopeless when I’m on the bike.  It really isn’t fun.  Honestly, it’s pretty miserable, both mentally and physically.  It seems like the road back to fitness will be impossibly long and difficult.  But I love riding my bike.  Just not right now.  I have to remember the love.  And I know that the best way to regain my fitness is to get out there and ride my limits (which are very low right now) consistently.  I need to log the hours.  I need to embrace the misery.  And I know, day by day, week by week, it will get better.

I turn 50 next year.  My friend Ren decided that we should push our limits and race the HooDoo 500 together to celebrate this milestone.  It’s a big, fat, hairy goal.  But it’s 10 months away.  Luckily, we’ve already chosen some milestone events to keep us motivated.  So today, I rode for Ren and her lovely wife, Tiffney, and their two beautiful daughters.  They’ve had a heck of a year, with the birth of a child, breast cancer diagnosis and treatment, and career changes.  So we’ll be celebrating them at HooDoo 500, too.

Thanks for getting me out there today, Ren (even if you couldn't make it out with me)!

the long way home

who doesn't like a little challenge? after a month off the bike in October, doing nothing but physical therapy and coaching clinics, I wanted to get back on the bike, add in some yoga (more on that in another post), and just find some consistency in my riding, my energy levels, and my mood. during October I'd also been focused on weight-loss and my caloric deficits, combined with the end of Daylight Saving Time, seemed to be affecting my sleep patterns. I needed balance. I needed energy. I needed a goal -- something that was consistent and achievable and that would motivate me.

so I gave myself the goal of riding at least one hour every day in November and December. I set no parameters besides time -- I could go long or short, flat or hilly, road or dirt. I would listen to my body, vary my intensity, and keep it fun.

I started a day early, with a challenging mountain bike ride with Team Velo Girls at Waterdog on October 31st. it hurt -- mentally and physically. in the 12 years I've been riding, I've had some extended periods of time off the bike, but usually due to illness, not injury. when you return to the bike from illness, you expect to be winded and to feel weak. I didn't expect this after my hiatus in October. this first ride was a wake-up call for me.

so, November 1st came and I rolled. pretty easy at first. road + dirt. 7 days in a row for a modest total of 10 hours. and on the 8th day it rained. and I was tired. really tired. I ramped up a little quickly, I think, with 10 hours on the bike that week as well as 2.5 hours of yoga and swing dance. so I gave myself permission to take a nap instead of a bike ride. it was the correct decision.

week #2 went well, but again, I had one day that I was just completely exhausted. so I gave myself permission to nap instead of ride. I decided that I hadn't failed at my goal by missing 2 days. I was still out there riding and being consistent, and that was the intention of my goal. in those 6 days I was able to ride 10 hours and also danced for 1.5 hours. I was learning how to manage my time to add in the riding and yoga. I was making time for myself!

week #3 and my body was happy (as was my mind). I was sleeping well, the weight-loss continued, and with the exception of one significant bonk, I was having great rides! I started doing some more challenging rides. most of my rides have been solo. I was having fun riding by myself, something I haven't done in years. I was listening to my body and going easy on days I needed recovery and hard on days I wanted challenge. and I was mountain biking a lot. all is good.

week #4 and I planned to ramp up my yoga. I finally found the time of day and styles of yoga that really worked in my life. my goal was to practice 5 days this week. life is good and I'm finding balance. I'm really happy. I'm smiling so much that I'm starting to annoy myself. unfortunately, a silly sleeping injury (seriously) kept me off the bike and out of the yoga studio for 3 days. on Thanksgiving day I got back out on the road for 3 hours in freezing cold. and I'm proud that I was able to maintain my caloric deficit in the face of Thanksgiving dinner. Friday, Saturday, and Sunday included more rides (road and mountain) and my first ever double-header yoga day.

November was a good month. I got on the bike 24 of 30 days. I rode almost 40 hours for a total of more than 400 miles, including 5 mountain bike rides. I practiced yoga 6 times and took 4 dance classes. I feel consistent. and happy. and very mobile. my head is in a really good space. I promised myself at least an hour a day -- just for me -- and I was able to achieve that.

one of the ways I've been able to fit this all into my schedule is to combine my bike + yoga time. no, I'm not stretching on the bike, but rather I'm riding my bicycle to yoga class. I have this silly 5-mile rule -- I don't drive my car if I'm going somewhere that's within 5 miles, so this fits right in with yoga class. I can ride the short way (only about 15 minutes), take class, and then take the long way home, the scenic route. the road less travelled. I've enjoyed riding through the hills and canyons of Hillsborough and Burlingame. I'm rediscovering roads I haven't ridden in years. I'm swearing under my breath at the 15-20% grades that pop up out of nowhere and then applauding myself at the top of those hills. I'm admiring the mansions. I'm noticing the subtle changes of fall: golden and red leaves transitioning from tree to ground. and I'm enjoying every single moment on the bike.

how often do you go out of your way to discover a new road, climb a new hill, or check out a new vista? too often in the past, I found myself "training" and forgetting what it is that I really love about the bike -- the same thing that I loved as a child -- the freedom! I was so concerned with the destination that I missed the journey. so I'll encourage you to give yourself the gift today of freedom. and fun. and cycling. go ahead, take the long way home!

today is the first day of the rest of your life

wow! it's April already. I'm feeling a bit lost -- as though someone stole the first three months of my year.

I have a choice this morning, as I sit and contemplate my day. I can feel regret about lost days, or I can feel optimistic, something I haven't felt in quite a while.

like many of you, I use landmarks and milestones in my planning: the first day of of the year, the first day of the month, the first day of the week, etc. so today, on the first day of April, I'm going to make a choice to live life.

instead of looking back and regretting the time lost to illness in February and March, I'm looking forward to all the days I've still got left this year. I've got 274 more opportunities to eat right and exercise. I've got 274 more chances to be productive and resourceful. I've got 274 more days to have a positive impact on my health and fitness.

how about you? how can you change the rest of your life......today?

keeping it short to go long

"a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."

-- Lao-tzu: The Way of Lao-tzu, Chinese philosopher (604 BC - 531 BC)

no truer words were ever spoken. in my job as coach, I need to help my clients set long-term and short-term goals. of course, those long-term goals, if taken by themselves, can seem a bit daunting and overwhelming. but that seems to be the methodology many of my clients take when planning their season/career. as humans, it's not in our nature to think of the "little picture." instead, we think about the big results.

for example, I have a client who would like to lose 20 pounds in order to become a more competitive climber. 20 pounds is a huge percentage of his body mass and almost impossible to conceive. but if we break that down to a 500 calorie deficit each day, we know that he should be able to lose that weight in just 20 weeks.

I have another client who would like to bring home the stars & bars from masters nationals. that's the only race she's targeting for a win this season. but we need to look at the full season to build in the appropriate peaks and recovery to prepare her for her target event.

and as another example, I have a client who plans to ride AIDS LifeCycle in June. this will be her first multi-day event. actually, it will be her first long ride. okay, reality is she's just getting back on the bike after years of being sedentary. and everytime she thinks about 500+ miles in a week she has a major freak-out. so we've put together a schedule of progressively longer, consecutive rides and she knows that if she is diligent in her training she'll be more than ready in June.

so as you think about your year, go ahead and look at the big picture. pick your important events. think about how you'd like to change your life. but then, break it down a little more and choose some intermediate and short-term goals that will support your long-term objectives.

and then get out there and take that first step!