if Cindy-Lou Who was a Velo Girl

Ode to Lake SoMuddy:


To a race they would go, the Velo Girls in pink,
with their mountain bikes and helmets, and even the kitchen sink.
'Twas Lake Sonoma calling for a little late-season fun.
"A mountain bike race in December should be good for the very first one.
For December is quiet and the race should be low-key,"
at least said the coach, yes, the coach, that is me!

So the girls loaded up with their bikes and their gear,
into cars, trucks, and wagons, and they dreamed of post-race beer.
They drove and they drove,
and they drove, drove, drove, drove,
over hill, over dale,
yes, they drove, drove drove, drove!

They arrived to find fog and muddy mud on the ground.
"Mud?" said the coach, not expecting it around.
"Sand, yes, or dirt, rocks, and roots, but not mud.
Oh how unusual. Oh what a dud.
This should be interesting, please do not flee,"
at least said the coach, yes, the coach, that is me!

At the line, blew the whistle, and the girls started out,
faces smiling and happy, not a single little pout.
They rode way up the hill in the fog and the mud,
then the fun really started when the coach fell with a thud.
How on earth could that be?
Yes, the coach fell with a thud, yes, the coach, that is me!

I was sliding on the ground within minutes of the gun!
I fell when I rode and I fell when I run.
I launched over the bar and I slid like a freak.
I plopped into a tree and I splished through a creek.
I fell over starboard and I fell all a-lee.
I fell, yes that's right, yes, the coach, that is me!

I fell in mud of red and brown,
I fell in mud and slopped around.
I fell in mud of black and green --
the greenest mud I'd ever seen.
I fell in mud of smokey gray,
I fell in mud all night and day!

I watched Edith and Kerri ride away like the wind,
for the podium was calling and there were medals to win.
And then to my ears, a fantabulous sound:
my cool teammate, Carolyn, giggling around.
Then Gnat, then Mariska, then sweet Cristina, too.
I would not be alone. I'll ride with friends, quite a few!

So the Velo Girls, they raced, and they even had fun,
but it's teammates that win, girls in pink, number one!